TF Archives

Cousins, Hingis - Come Doof with Us!

Author: Majick McStuff
Friday, November 2, 2007
Overnight headlines have confirmed that Martina Hingis is a coke user. While the star vehemently denies any wrongdoing, tests have proven the former number-one tennis star is a bit partial to the white line fever.

It's never been any surprise that drugs are rife within any scene. Some of the biggest names in sport have been vulnerable around the narcotic culture.

In recent weeks, the Ben Cousins saga has done nothing but highlight the fact that anyone can fall into the trap of crossing the threshold 'just that once', yet that 'once' becomes 'many' and it isn't the easiest thing to come back out of.

So, while the rest of the mainstream world highlights the 'disgrace' and 'shame' of these superstars who've walked along the dodgy path for a moment, there is one scene that, in particular, would welcome them all with open arms and, oh yeah, glowsticks.

Hingis, Cousins and anyone else who has been shunned by the wider community - the dance music scene is waiting for you all!

No longer will you feel the burden of spotlights, but rather you'll feel the spotlights of the rave lasers warmly glow against your skin. While dancing around in your phat pants and candy bracelets, you'll be able to let yourself be free to enjoy the repetitive beats and feel comfortable with your drug-taking, as just about everybody else will be on something as well.

Take drugs on the dancefloor, if you like. Nobody cares! In fact, if you don't, people think you're weird. The rave scene was made for you guys! No, seriously, it was! Relive those magic sports memories without having to do anything but take an hallucinogenic.

Hell, it also means you'll keep the weight off and you won't have to worry about the 'Such Is Life' tattoo stretching to read 'Shheuh iisishs liiiiiife' (try writing an interpretation of stretched tattoos!)

You could sit in a chill-out room with all of your favourite ravers and listen to far out music.

You could traverse at least three rooms of hard trance, dance and, for the chinstrokers, minimal.

Rehab is for those who can't keep up!

Come on - join the party, you crazy sports stars!

This story does not reflect the thoughts of anyone in particular.