Dance Is Dead Guardian Hack Mocks Drum & Bass Don

Guardian pop critic Alexis Petridis published a scathing critique of drum & bass and its biggest star Goldie this week, branding the notoriously aggressive DJ "unbearably pompous' and "a national laughing stock'.

The ex-Mixmag writer's suicidal hatchet job appeared in an otherwise harmless review of Lemon Jelly's new album 64-95 just as a (prescient-) spoof article popped up on the web headlined "Is Alex Petridis Dead-

"Debate was rife this week over whether ex-dance music journalist and Guardian music reviewer Alex Petridis is dead or not," the widely posted anonymously written article claimed.

"Various well respected commentators have pointed out that as he has had nothing particularly ground-breaking or original to say over the past year, it is quite reasonable to speculate that he is dead. Others have pointed to the rise in popularity of other areas of journalism as evidence that the market for cynical hacks jumping on bandwagons is diminishing."

Petridis' decision to challenge Goldie, however, could certainly prove problematic, given the drum & bass star's well known penchant for personally confronting critics. In 1996 he launched a typically ferocious campaign against Keith Flint, after The Prodigy singer unwisely questioned his hard man credentials in an NME interview.

"I was livid. I was going to send the boys round to his house. Grooverider wanted to punch his teeth out, Fabio wanted to kneecap him," Goldie told Muzik magazine at the time.

"I can't stand disrespect from within the scene, man, nobody can diss my fraternity," he raged. "Internal dissing has to stop, whether it's dance or the rock scene, whatever. If people want to start having a go at us about it, we can go "dancing'. Know what I mean-" he warned.

http://john_mpc.blogspot.com/2005/01/is-alex-petridis-dead.html ("Is Alexis Petridis Dead. . - ")

http://www.guardian.co.uk/arts/fridayreview/story/0,12102,1399769,00.html (Alexis on the "Jungle Committee: ". 3) Get bit part in EastEnders, appear on Celebrity Big Brother and become national laughing-stock (Goldie to investigate further).')
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