Body Pierced Young Brits Branded Scum

Top people's newspaper The Sunday Times launched a ferocious assault on young people with body piercings this week, suggesting parents embracing the fashion are behaving like savages.

"Today, alas, the drunken, vulgar, semi-literate scum at the bottom of our society pierce their children without a thought," said Professor Gideon Carter in the newspaper's Intellectual's Guide To Fashion.

"Usually because they have pierced and painted every part of their own rancid demises and crave the canvas of the progeny's virgin flesh."

The professor's comments followed the publication of statistics in the Observer the week before which revealed that one in three women aged 16 to 24 has her belly button pierced with 94% (across both sexes) having had their ears pierced.
Tags