Big Brother Australia - Part Two
Tuesday, 26 June 2007
After all the fanfare of the opening night, the housemates are starting to settle into a groove (heh) and make themselves comfortable within their new surrounds.
Separations have already begun in the house, and not everybody's happy that Portia 'Boobies' Surreal is getting the most attention from the Big Brother crew. By attention, we mean there's a fair bit of 'oooh' and 'yeah, you'd like that, wouldn't you-' emanating from behind the mirrors of the compound. Her boobs are just as big as Emma's from the real show (we say 'real', but you know what we mean). Of course you'd want to get a look-in, female or otherwise.
Throughout the last few days, things have started to become heated between Derrick "I started Techno" May and Dave "I make it better" Clarke. Derrick won't let go of the fact he wrote one record that revolutionised the way electronic music is heard, while Dave believes he is the only person in the history of the world who's been able to make music sound cool through his sets (albeit with around 400 galloping beats in every mix he's ever done). In fact, Dave believes he wrote Strings of Life and that Derrick was just a vessel to carry the song into its current state.
Sasha and Digweed have kept to themselves, preferring not to get caught up in the minor tussles between Tiesto, Oakenfold and PvD - trance/commercial music masters. PvD is still going on about how he refuses to shower because he'd just be pigeonholing himself as clean. Tiesto - whose first name is DJ, by the way - is following PvD's suit and not showering, but in true one up-manship fashion (fancy way of saying 'remix'), is not only steering clear of the showers, but also not brushing his teeth (kind of like his remix of the remix of Adagio For Strings). Oakenfold is too consumed by his mullet to even wash or brush his teeth.
Misstress Barbara and Mrs Wood are happy talking about the subjectivity of females within a heavily male-dominated industry. They have been eyeing each other off, in a more-than-friends way, and we don't think it will be too long before we actually see bit of action between the two chicks (they're not good looking, so they may as well be lesbians). Portia is just happy watching it all from the sidelines, near the mirrors...oh yeah...those mirrors... YOU LIKE THAT!
Tomorrow...what the rest of the housemates are up to. Tags